Muppets


For everyone saying the Muppets are race-less, that’s the problem. Representation really does matter. Mr. Rogers never pulled punches when including as many people as he could. It was groundbreaking when he shared a pool with officer Clemmons in 1969. But for him it was just another day of being amazing. The Muppets started out being generic, but they also ended up adopting some negative stereotypes. Homeless people living in trash cans, drug addicts looking for their next “cookie” and vampires that have a compulsion to count everything like forty times. I imagine Jim Henson designed the muppets to represent everyone, but it’s been co-opted. No one cried when they included an orphan. I’m not sure what’s up with Elmo, but that’s inclusivity. Tickle fetish? Even muppets can have kinks, and that’s fine.


But suddenly they add a positive role-model (I hope! I haven’t watched it yet. Is he a pimp or some shit? Leader of the cookie monster gang? I hope he’s positive!) and that threatens people who know that some poor child out there is seeing a single father who loves his son (Is it a custody thing, where he doesn’t want the kid but learns to love him slowly over the years? Lessons on equality shouldn’t take season to impart.) and suddenly there are more options available.

And before you say I’m wrong, Burt and Ernie have been lovers for years and LGBTQIA rights are still jogging near the starting point. Maybe if they made it clearer that it’s fine for two “friends” to share a bed together the people that fear that’s what is happening will see that it really is happening.

We need change now. I’d love for the last generation to have an unearned sense of pride in their race to have already been born, and all future generations just be woke af and rather then be defensive in all interactions, just go with it. I swear a lot because it gives people who aren’t actually listening something to complain about. I know when I’m wasting my time. Example:”Human trafficking is a huge issue in our District. There are hourly hotels, or no-tels operating on the main streets. Do you think that shit is cool?”


If they weren’t paying attention they snapped to at the word shit because it tells them it’s important. They piece together the main words, human trafficking, hotels and shit. “I don’t use escorts so I don’t have an opinion.” or some such defensive statement, but I know you didn’t care so I’ll move on to another topic. Did you know property taxes are bullshit? They are!

Also if you drop an F bomb in polite company their monocles pop right out of their eye holes. It’s glorious. Sometimes the chain is weak and it breaks when it hits the floor and they’re all like “Nooooooooo! My favorite monocle!” and I’m all “Should have had a better chain, yo! Mine is wallet chain grade! It’s heavy, sure, but mine doesn’t break like your bitch ass one did!” My eye hole is ripped, from holding my 13 lb monocle in place when I’m out and about. Six pack eyelids!